A Post I Just Discovered from a Friend

Guest Blogger Christy Collins (from her myspace blog- Aug 29, 2007)

Every now and then something happens and I can't hold it in any longer. I just bubble over and there's no stopping it. Tonight was one of those nights. You see, the last Wednesday of every month at my church, Southbrook, is a Night of Worship. (I'm gonna brag about the worship just a little...) they are AMAZING!! All of them are extremely talented musicians, but not only that, they know how bring you into God's presence. Especially on nights like tonight. It's so easy to sit in church and sing the songs and pray the prayers and go through the motions. Scripture tells us that wherever 2 or more are gathered, God's presence is there, but sometimes it just doesn't feel that way. Tonight I felt God's presence more than I have in a long time.

In my Bible study we have been studying Romans. Paul spends the first 3 chapters explaining how horrible we are as humans. How we are constantly letting God down and turning our backs on him. We are these awful, filthy, disgusting people, but God never fails to pick us up and hold us and give us one more chance. I know it sounds like the cliche christian thing to say, but God sent His only son to die for us. He sacrificed Himself on the cross to pay our debt. We came up with this analogy... it's like we are on trial for an incredibly awful deed, like rape or murder. And God is both the victim and the judge. Instead of just forgiving us and then sentencing us, He not only forgives us, but let's us go and tells us to come live with Him forever. Who does that!?! No one!! That's the point. God did what no one on earth would, or could, ever do. Tonight this point came into even more focus than before. It's not that we are unworthy, but rather we are so incredibly special that God can't stand not being with us.

When we finally realize the extent of God's grace, the result is the desire to follow Him wherever He may lead us. For me that was Waxhaw, North Carolina. Why oh why did I move here? I used to think it was because it was time to grow up and start a business. When I visited over a year ago, North Carolina made sense. I thought I was here to start my future. But tonight I realized something different. I realized I don't know why I'm here. When God shines the light on our path, He shines it right at our feet. He doesn't show us the whole path. He doesn't even show us 5 steps down the path! While I don't know the whole reason why I'm here, I do know part of the reason I'm here. God placed me in this state, in this city, in this business, in this house, in this circle of friends for one specific reason: to be me. And in being me, I am meant to trust Him...to follow Him... and to help others follow Him however that looks. Sometimes it's taking a walk and listening to another's stresses. Sometimes it's dropping an encouraging word. Sometimes it's providing insight into a situation. And other times it is simply being a friend. Being someone to fill the empty space and keep you company.

I'm not anyone special in the view of society. I'm just Christy. But I am someone special to God and He has a special purpose for me. Like I said before, we don't get to know that purpose and that's okay. In the recent past a local fire fighter died in the line of duty. People call him a hero and they are right, but not just because he was a fire fighter. He's a hero because his life, and his death, brought people to the Lord and that to me is a true hero. We are only human. I've heard it said many times before that God doesn't need us. He doesn't have to use us for his perfect plan, but He chooses to. Wow! Why would anyone choose me? Because He loves me and desires my company. He WANTS to spend time with me and wants me to share in His joy.

Tonight I was overcome with gratitude and awe at the gift of grace God has given to me. Not just to me, but to all of us. I started this by talking about worship and I'm going to end it the same way. Music has such power. A simple song can move us in ways we never thought possible. Each time the band sang a new song I was touched. It seemed like every word they sang was exactly what I needed to hear, like it was God speaking to me through the lyrics. I realize that you all weren't there tonight so these words may not touch you like they touched me, but I hope they will at least make you stop and think.

"Lord I want to yearn for you. I want to burn with passion over you. And only you."

"I was carried to the table, seated where I don't belong. Carried to the table, swept away by His love. And I don't see my brokenness anymore, when I'm seated at the table. I'm carried to the table, the table of the Lord."

"And all that I can do is just fall. It's the appropriate response to your call. I'm face down at the cross. I crawl. All that I can do is just fall."